Happy Fathers day to me

Here is a copy of a ‘log/diary’ I wrote just after Harvey was born all those years ago. I have never ever edited it since as I wanted it to be a true recollection of what happened the night he was born. I wish I’d done one for Jennifer too.

We went into hospital for 5pm on the 21st, ward f2a, nmgh, got shown to the double side room.
still having tightenings every 5 mins or so, not *that* bad, just like the past couple of days.
Louise examined by midwife and given pessary at 7pm. had to stay lay down till 8pm, we then got up and walked around. went for a walk to the Breath Easy Garden. Went back to ward at about 8.50.
still having tightenings.
at about 10 past 9, new midwife on duty said hello and then i went home.

I was sat at PC at 1.25am and got a phone call from above midwife, saying she had been taken over to delivery suite. i asked if waters broke yet, no.
I had a wash, got dressed, got in car and went to hospital for 1.50

Louise in delivery room 4.

Tightenings happening more by now, had been examined and was 3cm dilated. Has already been given 2 paracetamol, 2 some other (codeine?), and pethadine.
Was sucking on gas and air when i got there.

wmidwife checked and because so soon after pethadine, no epidural yet, but to be examined and reassessed at 3am.

Pains were getting quite bad by about 10 past 2 so midwife ran a hot bath (with baby bubbles). Louise went to the bathroom and got in, seemed to ease the pain (as did rubbing lkower back, either side to side or in a small circular motion).

pains getting worse, louise crying with each one, on all fours in bath, bloody show in bath. i got midwife, and nipped into DS to turn my mobile off.

went back to bathroom, helped lou out, got her back to ds, as going out of door of bathroom, lou just got on the floor for another, and was crying.

got back to ds.

midwife examined her, 5cm. pains regular and strong now, and getting worse
so midwife hits emergenct button for other midwives. they come in and called for anesthatist for epidural.

anaesthatist comes and because pain is so bad, lou is moving around with each one, anaest says “i cant give her an epi now, all i can give is something in her back to take the edge off. call me when you need it”

doctor is called

midwives worried about dropping heart rate on the monitor. they dont know whether its babys heart rate dropping or loss of signal. they decided to put monitor onto babys head.

i move over to her right side, and midwife examines her again a short while later, so they can decide how far gone she is….talk of 10 o clock and 11 o clock, “i feel this, and that” and the second midwife says “and no cervix” other midwife “no cervix” “louise youre fully dilated”

They manage to get sensor on top of babys head.

Doctor arrives. pains VERY strong now, louise screaming with each one.

much pushing with contractions
loiuse screaming
me encouraging
3 midwives and doctor.
they are concerned for babys heart rate

head keeps making an appearance with pushing, and then going back with relax
doctor invites me to bottom of bed to see head. 1 mnutes later lou pushes and i see about 2 inches of white lubricant covered hair. cant tell the colour

i encourage lou some more

back to head
more contractions
lou screaming “give me a caesarian”
midwive explaining she cant, its too late, she must push
lou “i cant”
lots of encouragement
we holding her legs apart, she wants to close them
legs into stirrups, lou kicks them out
manages to catch a midwive in the face next to me
other midwife, quite stern “look louise youre hurting us now you HAVE to get this baby out”
they worried about baby, he still wont come out, lou not pushing hard enough
decide to use sucker on his head, doctor manages to get it attached (hurts lou)
“we’re really worried about baby, he’s tired now and wants to come out”
eventually head comes out and i can see an ear, she keeps pushing, no waiting for contractions now. push push push

baby comes out, cord round his neck (albeit a little loosely)
pink body, white face
doctoris working cord free gently
i see shakes of head between midwives, and whispers of ‘rescus’
one midwive fires up rescus machine, and i think he’s dead,
although still trying to reassure louise she’s done well, he looks like me, her ears etc, i still think he’s dead
he lets out a little whimper (1-2secs) as they cut the cord
he’s put onto rescus machine, and is being cleaned.
i hear one midwife telling other, “nothing, then a whimper on bed, then nothing again” they are holding small mouthpiece near his mouth.

he occasionally whimpering
i’m still reassuring louise
baby whimpering more often, still being rescused.
midwife who said “youre hurting us”, looks at me and beckons for me to come over, i mouth “is he alright?” she nods
i go over and she explains about being pink but white face.
i stroke his face, looking back and talking back to lou, while she gives birth to massive placenta, and all the blood is coming out etc

they say to baby “get some of this in your lungs, it’s good stuff” to which i add “sorry mate, get some now while you can i havent got any at home”.,

baby looks a bit better.

louise is stitched up (2 stitches)

he poos on machine

they wrap him up and offer him to me, i say lou gets first cuddle
they ask me if i have camera, i take it out and shoot first cuddle.
after, they put him in cot and he poos in that too.
i have a hold too.
then one midwife left, and weighs him @7lb, another midwife is back in room now.
we chat about leannes ‘book’ betting and they put nappy on him, i have a hold again, and louise tries feeding (sma).

Happy Fathers day to me

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